Three Ways To Overcome Fear of Failure

On a conscious level, we all know that the fear of failure is the barrier to success. When we aren’t the one standing on the precipice facing judgement, we have all the nerves to recite motivational quotes to get the person to take the leap of faith. Why is it that we ourselves aren’t able to practice what we preach?

​That's because fear is an autonomic response; it shuts you down, takes over the reins and offers you only two options: fight or flight. Most people take flight. Fear is a prick and If it was a person, I would stab him in the face with a blunt spoon. F#%@ you, fear. 

Here's my Alpha Mind philosophy of getting over fear in the most fun way possible. (Yipee!) They have been tried and tested by both teenagers and adults and the feedback I got was very encouraging. Well, let's get you started.

1. Bad Past Experiences    |    "The last time I tried, I crashed and burned."
   If you failed at the attempt once, it's only natural to get cold feet the next time a similar situation comes up, but do you know what's the solution to this? More failures! It's true. Remember that Smart Alec who joked that if you aim to fail, you will always succeed? Well it turns out there is some truth to that.  
   
   Try this: Turn Your Failure Into a Game
   The more you experience failure and rejection, the more resilient you will get. So the natural thing to do is to aim to fail, BUT there's a rule to this game. You can't fail the same way twice. You need to innovate. Try a new method to fail each time you try. You will find that failing is not that easy after all. 
   
   #TrueStory: Writer Ryan Ong turned his fear of rejection around by starting a hobby of collecting rejection slips from publishers. Each time he got rejected, he wrote his cover letter a little differently, attempted a different style of pitching. By the time he got his lucky break, he had amassed over 300 rejection slips.
   
   
2. Can't Handle Judgement  |  "But I'm afraid that they will laugh at me."
   You're absolutely right. People are going to laugh at you because we are all sick, twisted bastards and we entertain ourselves at the expense of others. But you know what? If you are able to laugh at yourself too, it immediately nullifies any embarrassment. The truth is, people aren't laughing at you - they don't even know you - they are laughing at the situation. 
   
   Try this: Learn to Detach Yourself from Your Task
   When you are able to remove self from task, you will begin to see that people's judgement is not a personal attack. Recognise that when things don't go right, it is not you that they condemn, It's the task and the outcome that they are laughing at. It's not you.
   
   #TrueStory: Intern Andy Lieow was a quivering, stuttering wreck on his first day of work. I sat him down and told him that as an intern, he can do no wrong. Every mistake is a learning curve. If he did something wrong, he should stand beside me and look at the situation together. He took to that mindset like fish to water and milked it for all it's worth. I remember one time he laughed so hard at his own mistake he fell off the chair. Everyone in office laughed at the sight and he laughed too. Staff from the other department came by to check out the commotion and they started laughing too. When Andy left the company three months later, he was a changed man. He learned so much in the time he was here because he did not let fear of failure hold him back. 
   
   
3.  Self Doubt  |  "But I'm not good enough."
   No one is ever good enough. No one. All we can do is get better with each try, hopefully. The way I handle self-doubt is to compete with the only variable I have control over - and that's me. I gain confidence from outdoing myself. Well, if this method seems too abstract for you, I've this other method that just might work.
   
   Try this: Role-Play a Different Persona
   If you think you suck and cannot make it in life, then create a persona of someone you think can make it. Walk in the shoes of that person and try to think how he/she thinks. When placed in a situation that you can't handle, imagine yourself to be the other person and react accordingly. Set up a different persona for different occasions. Be creative, explore body language, tonality and style.
   
   #TrueStory: I bumped into an old friend the other day and met his beautiful wife. She was a 9.5 on the hot scale and he was everything she's not. What was his secret I asked. This was what he said: "When I first picked her up at the convention, I imagined how Aaron would have done it. He's always shameless like that. When I needed to talk to her, I imagined how you would have done it, and I just started talking and talking non-stop. I imagined that if she rejected me, she was rejecting you instead, and you suck, not me."

If you tried these techniques and they work for you or if you have any other wacky ideas you would like the share, please post it in the comments field below.