How To Deal With People Who Don't See Things Your Way

You can either grab the person by the hair and bulldoze your righteous opinions all over them or you can try the following method. 

​In my line of work, I deal with people with varying degree of risk appetite and level of acceptance. Often times it can be frustrating to deal with them when "the situation is so simple". Not everyone is blessed to see things as simple as you or me. What's simple to us could be a life threatening ordeal for another.

How do we handle someone who can't see it our way? 

Here are a few things you DON'T do to aggravate the matter. 

1. Don't tell the person he/she is wrong for feeling that way. It's not a right or wrong situation. It's all in the mind. The person is as right as you are. 
2. Don't belittle the person's concern. It's a legit concern. Nobody likes to be worried if they can help it. So don't talk down to them. 
3. Don't offer them advise on how to handle their emotions. You don't know how they feel and think. Don't assume to solve their problems for them. 

This is what you can do:

1. Reassure them. Be a leader and take charge of the situation. Let them know that you will handle it. You just need them to manage their thoughts as you go about managing the situation.
2. Give them space to work with. I learned that there's a term for it - It's called Holding Space. Be supportive without being oppressive.
3. Empathize with them. Get off your high horse and walk in their shoes. Maybe you can get a sense of a deeper problem that they may not even be aware of.

Well, that's today's Alpha Mind tip on how to be a better leader/boss/friend/co-worker. You can also join me on my Alpha Mind 30-Day Challenge here or check out my other thoughts on life and living here on my Facebook page.

Leave me a comment and let me know if this tip worked out for you.

​Update: (This one is for Natalie Trog who left me a comment on Facebook asking about dealing with impossible in-laws)

So you have tried the more diplomatic approach, you have tried the Alpha Mind approach, and everything seem to just fall flat with the person you're dealing with. In fact, said person is abrasive and antagonistic, and every time you have to deal with them, you get shot through with a bolt of blue. The person is effing impossible to deal with. 

You cannot win every fight, and not every mother's son and daughter are open to compromise. In fact, they may see your soft approach as a weakness and capitalise on it. For people like that, I say fuck-it and walk away. Some fights are not worth it.

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